What was the dumbest thing you did while in the military?

[LRS Guy]

Lets see there are some tough ones here:

1. Tell the BDE XO I think he is a fag....he was.
2. Speak my mind about the BN XO's job performance in the company of fellow O's and NCO's
3. Deliberatly get my PSG dog-ass, falling down drunk so we won't have to PT with him in the morning....DAMM HE COULD DRINK TOO.
4. Turn down Pathfinder school
5. Trade med supplies to the SEALs for a whole bunch of demo....didn't have a place to put the demo, besides it was late when I got in. Long story short, MPs tow my vehicle, vehicle confiscascated. Leg MPs freak out over the demo and several unauthorized belt fed weapons (PKMs)....anyway I had to explain myself to leg Col whose compound we were living on. CoC went to bat for me.

Damm, I have more stories that is sad!!!!!

[Diablo]

I suspect the statue of limitations has run on this so WTF.
There was a time when in a state in the very northest section of our fine nation on a four day pass with some friends, we managed to get into a brawl in some shithole bar. After some good E&E work we thought it was a good idea to use one of the "surplus" CS grenades that "happened" to be in the back of the car. While watching the bikers scramble out every exit they could find with snot running from their noses remains as one of the funniest memories I have, the level of paranoia that followed us for the next few months as rumors of a "federal investigation" worked its way through the rumor mill cause us all to become much more humble in our off-post adventures.

[old13b]

I'll take a shot at this. As a young pv2 My battalion was out on a ftx in korea. It gets to be chow time and it's finally my turn to go. I grab my gear and head towards the field mess when my section sgt calls me back. He is holding my weapon and asking if I forgot something! Now is where the story get's interesting. ;) I retrieve my weapon and head for the mess hall.

I go through the line get my chow and head back for my gun, then realize that once again I dont have my weapon! Oh shit! Beat feet back to the mess and see my weapon next to the Immersion heater thing that you dunked your mess kit in to sanitize it before eating. Only problem is the that "Smoke" is standing next to it cleaning his mess kit. (For you non FA types this is the Chief of Firing Battery SFC)

I go through the exit for the line so I look like I didnt leave the mess hall without my weapon, Boldly walk up and grab my weapon, say good chow Smoke and move out.

I am about half way back to my gun when once again I hear my section sgt call my name, from behind me at the mess.

I turn around and there stands my Sgt and Smoke. My Sgt is holding 2 weapons and Smoke is not armed. However he does have a pissed off expression on his face.

So yes, not only did I forget my weapon twice, But I also grabbed Smoke's weapon and ran off with it!

They decided that since I liked his weapon so well They would let me carry his weapon and ammo for the rest of the ftx. Of course his ammo consisted of a complete 155 round. (Round, powder canister, and a primer )

[Zimmy]

After all the tales of civilians dressing up as Drill Sergeants and taking rifles from recruits at Ft. Benning (if they were true), I was scared to let my rifle out of sight. I guess you were lucky your CoC is who found it.

[Hendo]

It had to be Bosnia when I was on gate guard. We were on Comanche Base (Tuzla West) and had these 12 hour guard shifts from midnight to noon and vice versa and these kids (you know the ones, they're EVERYWHERE you deploy ) and they had this little dog that they'd bring with them. Of course some of us would give the kids stuff and feed the dog so they were there all of the time. At one point the threat level was increased and we had a 5 Ton (truck ) put in front of the serpentine to act as a "gate" and we'd drive it back and forth to block the road. Well, one night there was a convoy going back to Eagle base and I was pulling the truck forward (no ground guide because why would I need one as a, BRAND NEW E-4 ) and a buddy of mine was walking up and waved at me. I waved back and continued to back up until the truck was where it was before. I opened the door and hopped down and he says to me, "Dude, you just ran over the dog". I say and start to walk away and he says "Look" and shined his Quadruple D cell maglight/billy club/runway light down at this friggin mut . I then began to FREAK out big time . My "buddies" thought it was HILARIOUS as what the hell was I supposed to do with a dead dog that I just crushed with this 5 ton? Well let me tell you, there just happened to a bridge over a pretty good sized stream about 30 meters from where we were. SO, I scoop up this smashed pooch in a trash bag and take him to the bridge to drop him the stream but didn't go out far enough on the bridge so when I dropped the bag it landed on the bank instead of in the water . Now, in all of my Ninja Turtle gear (that's what the "Coalition" folks called us) I had to scramble down this steep, muddy hill, get the bag, throw it in the water and climb back up the side. Real bad night and I felt bad but the when the kid came back the next day we gave him a box of MRE scraps and he was set. I was the only one in my platoon with a confirmed kill in Bosnia........yeah I know.

[HDParatrooper78]

Climing a 150' water tower drunk with the duel intent of painting one each unit patch on the water tower and having the longest "money shot" (won beer for that by the way) while at gunnery.

[BushRat2/505]

I'll post a vicarious entry.. I've got a buddy who climbed a water tower near Ft Bragg and spray painted the Recondo patch on a certain water tower after graduating from the course. MFH!!!

[shadowcop92]

Well I was drunk and it involved the Panama Canal....I was drunk and on a dare swam the canal and i did not intentionally drink the water but I do remember puking my guts out.

Other dumbass thing I did was race a motorcycle across the bridge of americas at a high rate rate of speed...surprised I survived panama.

[RH]

Mine involved a 5th of Jack Daniels and a 6 pack of Bud tall boys I drank by myself...5 of my closest Ranger buddies, who drank their favorite cool-aid and beers...an alert...and an inspection by the Regimental Commander, and Regimental CSM.

Nuff said there!

Not a very pretty scene.

[Milktruckcopilot]

I turned down a slot at Air Assault School over summer. For some reason that bothers the piss out of me now.

[gunsmittys]

Mine was prior to joining the military...I turned down appointments to West Point and the AF Academy even turned down the Coasties--who knew they had an acadmey? Yes I did well on the SATs and ACTs and was a better than average 110 and 400 m hurdler; I was a smart athlete.

I was young dumb and stupid and didn't see me in a GI Joe suit. Was running out of cash for college so I enlisted in the AFRes..dad was none to thrilled was even less thrilled when I went to the Army to jump of planes.

In retrospect should have taken one of the academy spots; we live an learn. Can't change time, if we could we wouldn't be who we are today.

[Stryker15-31]

Uhm well I got involved with a Division soldiers wife that was supposedly divorced, and come to find out after I broke up with her she wasa cple months underage....ya. Never got caught or anything tho. Surprised me to find out she was 17.....

[Stryker15-31]

Hitting a Lieutenant in the side of the head with my steel pot....

In front of the whole Company formation......

But it was worth it.....because when I got back from the Stockade I was the company hero!.....Even the CO knew he deserved it!

Dude that hilarious lol. I wish I had the balls to do some shit like that once or twice.... Awesome !!

[Skysoldier]

Stryker.....you can find the story behind that post here.

http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropz...ead.php?t=5378

[Hendo]

I turned down a slot at Air Assault School over summer. For some reason that bothers the piss out of me now.

What was her name? Been there done that .