Random Thought of the Day

[Ironic-Mike]

Anonymous Engineer Sergeant: Never ask an Engineer for a dynamite blow job; you just might get one.

[Sapper Mike]

Anonymous Engineer Sergeant: Never ask an Engineer for a dynamite blow job; you just might get one.

Gee, thanks Mike. Now I have the image of doing a "Dynamite PLF" running through my head.

Boom.

Chute re-deploys.

Begin PFL - 1, 4, Head. Or what's left of 4 and Head.

[ShortBusDriver82]

***** BUMP******

Let's get this bitch started back up....


Why does Dark's mom always insist on being the Donkey in the Donkey show???


If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song...


When I was in the 3rd grade, a bully in school started beating me up every day. At first I didn't say anything, but then I told dad. He got a real scared look on his face and asked if the bully had a big dad. I said I didn't know. But he still seemed scared. And just a few days later we moved to a new town. Dad told me that if anyone picked on me, not to fight back. Unless I knew the kid didn't have a dad or the dad was real small. Otherwise just curl up in a ball.

[Ironic-Mike]

[Sapper Mike]

Arrrgggghhhh, Phoebe Cates. Gotta love her.

[AbnJack]

What's wrong with warming up a cold and wet kitten in the microwave?

Nothing. And because a microwave warms a cat from the inside out, this method makes an excellent dick warmer if you live in a cold enviroment


WARNING: make sure you stretch your pussycat out slowly, especially the first few times

[CAL]

So, are you ever minding your own business and something happens to you or you witness something that really fucking pisses you off? Of course, it happens to all of us. APO now brings you this marvelous thread to tell us about it. I'll start...

I fucking hate people. Just because you put on your turn signal does NOT mean that I must make room for you as you cut me off while changing lanes and wedge yourself between me and the vehicle in front of me. And then I see that you're running your mouth on the fucking CELL PHONE! FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKER - I HATE YOU!

[Grouchy Hippo]

If she was using the cell phone and stuck out her other arm to change lanes then she probably didn't have a hand on the steering wheel and the lane change was accidental because she was actually flinging a booger not signalling.

And everyone knows that a woman in a tight skirt can't use her legs to hold the wheel like a man can.

Of course neither can a man in a tight skirt.

[AbnJack]

Of course neither can a man in a tight skirt.

hmmmmm.....I'm going to have to put that theory to a test.

When it comes to driving, one thing that really pisses me off is drivers who ride your ass for miles in the right hand lane, then swing out pass you,
almost shear your front bumper off returning to the right hand lane and then keep going the same speed they were in the first place.

[VB]

The only think I can say (short of writing a fuckin' book!), is that within a 50 to 75 mile radius of Philadelphia, Pa we have the worst fuckin' drivers in the States!

[ABN5-0]

Ever been to Scranton? They are the worst drivers ever. Should see my wife try and parallel park.

[VB]

Ever been to Scranton? They are the worst drivers ever. Should see my wife try and parallel park.

At least she trys to park. We have people who will double park when there is an open space right next to them with more then enough room to pull in!

[AbnJack]

Ever been to Scranton? They are the worst drivers ever. Should see my wife try and parallel park.

You see the new tech they have on cars that allow cars to parallel park themselves?
My ol' lady can't back up or parallel park, so I was thinking about getting her one of those cars. But she'd just scream at it and tell it that it was doing it all wrong. I just can't do that to a defenseless piece of machinery.

Why is it a women don't know how to do something, and as soon as she sees a man doing it she starts telling him how it SHOULD (hear as shrill scream) be done?

[CAL]

And fuck cab drivers. I hate those motherfuckers.

[Recon133]

And everyone knows that a woman in a tight skirt can't use her legs to hold the wheel like a man can.

Of course neither can a man in a tight skirt.

How often do you drive a car in a tight skirt, Bro. Is there something you want to tell us?