Random Thought of the Day

[Ironic-Mike]

I shoulda stayed at the *Range: Navy 17, Army 3.

Next year: We send over The Heathen to instill some Victory Spirit.
Win or face a kick in the nuts.











*I was getting in some practice with my Avatar

[K.M.I.A]

I really miss smoking good cigars.

[VB]

I really miss smoking good cigars.

So are you saying that all you smoke now are bad cigars?

[Guymullins]

I really miss smoking good cigars.

Kiss and make up with Fidel and you are in business again.

[K.M.I.A]

So are you saying that all you smoke now are bad cigars?

Have'nt smoked anything in eight years,but when I smoked a cigar it was always a good cigar.

[lz_NorthPole]

Damn it is Cold Outside! Global Warming MY ASS!

[P-Chop]

How do the holes get in the back of my underwear? Its got to be either acid fumes...............or..................my ass crack has teeth!

[Zimmy]

It is the last day before Christmas break. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.


Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."


Little Johnny says to himself, "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."


Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"


Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."


Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."


Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.


Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"


Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."


Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."


Johnny is even madder than before.


Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"


Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."


Teacher: "That's right Nancy , you may also leave."


Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.


When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"


The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"


Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"

[Ironic-Mike]

Wouldn't you just know it? I'm taking pain pills to day. But for once it isn't my knees that are making my eyes tear, it's my lower back.

I was sitting down at my PC and copying files from one Flash Drive to another, backing everything important and otherwise (porn). I start to stand up to get a glass of water and my back starts to shriek. I didn't do anything special or different, and here I am; suddenly laying on the floor in severe pain. Seven and a half hours and two Motrin pills later the pain has subsided from stabbing to hammering.

I wonder how hard I would have to beg MI to get her to walk on my back with her Corcoran's?

[Falschirmjaeger]

I wonder how hard I would have to beg MI to get her to walk on my back with her Corcoran's and a thong?

Fixed it for ya.

[Guymullins]

Nice of you to make a thong and dance about it.

[Ironic-Mike]

Nice of you to make a thong and dance about it.

*rimshot*

[Zimmy]

I finally got around to going fishing this mornin' - but after awhile, I ran
out of worms.

Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth, and frogs are good Bass
bait. Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth. I
grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog and put it in my bait
bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bitten. I
grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth.

His eyes rolled back, he went limp! I released him into the lake without
incident and carried on with my fishing, using the frog as bait.

A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot. There was that damn snake with
two frogs in his mouth!

[skeet5413]

OH! WHATEVER

[Ironic-Mike]

Just wondering here....but.....Has any engineer ever played with a yo-yo with Prima-cord as the string?