Funniest "pinning" ceremony I ever witnessed

[fstroupe]

We all attended "pinning" ceremonies for Senior and Master Wings. I've seen wings pinned on with a kevlar or steel pot, saw a guy punched so hard by a bodybuilder running from across the room that he slammed against the wall five feet behind him...I think that the pins were sticking out of the guy's back and stuck into the wall LOL. One where like 50 guys were lined up to punch this poor skinny mofo. But none compared to this.

I spent about 1.5 years in the 519th MI Bn, 525th MI Bde, XVIII Corps. The battalion was only maybe 20% paratroopers when I arrived, maybe 30% or so when I left. Probably six months into my being assigned there I was attached to Joint Special Operations Command, but I occasionally was ordered to come back to the unit for records checks, etc. I'm pretty sure this ceremony was one of those occasions.

For those of you who have never been in a Combat Service or Service Support battalion, non-infantry LTCs tend to be wannabee infantry commanders, and since none of them have been infantry, they tend to run their battalions as they imagine an infantry commander would, and tend to be TOO hardcore. On top of that, this guy also had to contend with wanting to be the Commander of a REAL Airborne unit rather than a leg unit with a smattering of paratroopers...so he was usually a real dick because of an inferiority complex that they all have.

Seems that the formation started out with everyone from the battalion, don't remember the purpose. After that business was taken care of, all legs were told to leave the formation, and all new Senior and Master Wings recipients were called out, at least a dozen of them.

One of those who had recently earned Senior Wings was a female SGT that I knew personally. She was in a different company but we had a common close (female) friend who had introduced us, and though we never really were that close we had done PT runs together several times, had been at the same parties or gatherings, etc.

She was I guess the most hardcore female soldier I met while I was in the army. I don't recall her name, it totally escapes me, but her dad had been a fairly famous commander of 75th Ranger Regiment. (or at least everyone knew the name and associated it with him) She could out run, out ruck, out pushup me and probably 3/4th of the guys I ever knew. She was also very intelligent, I don't recall her MOS but it was one of the MI Signal Intelligence MOSs and they all were pretty tough. Not sure if she had a college degree at the time but she had already done some college. She was a pretty hard partyer, but seemed to know when to stop, and she at least acted heterosexual. (no, I never did her but I knew a guy or two that probably had)

And she may have been the foxiest woman I ever saw in uniform. Lookswise, she had everything going for her, including a beautiful pair of breasts that looked as if they may explode at any time. In this day and time you would be pretty certain that they weren't real, as common as cosmetic surgery is, but hell, back then they had to be. And those breasts are the highlight of this story.

So those to be honored fell into a single rank in front of the formation. The Commander produced a Kevlar that he was going to use to hammer the wings home. He didn't hit THAT hard, but it doesn't take much with those heavy bastards. As he stood in front of each honoree, the formation was screaming BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD!.

Then he stood in front of her. He obviously had not thought about pinning wings on a female soldier with such large breasts, and you could see that he was totally at a loss. The crowd was silent. I personally did not want to see anyone damage those beautiful bazzongas, but that's just me. Thinking back, it was kind of like being in the Roman Coliseum, waiting on Cesar to give the "thumbs up" or "thumbs down", time stood still waiting on the events to finish unfolding.

After what seemed an eternity, though it was probably only three or four seconds, she yelled BLOOD! The formation went crazy! The LTC still was very unsure about it but now he had no choice. He placed the wings and tapped them smartly with the Kevlar. There was no explosion. She didn't even make a face, as had most of the guys.

I'm pretty sure that was the last time I was in the battalion area except while I was outprocessing to head back to Division a few months later. I ran into her occasionally the first year or so after I went back to Division but never in a one-on-one situation where I might mention the ceremony, and never saw her again after that. I suppose that she is now probably an executive in a high-tech defense contractor or the like, she seemed to be that kind of chick.

[old grunt]

I bet you wanted to see if the ceremony "left a mark".......................

[mphellon]

Sounds like you are referring to a Sgt by the name of Molly S who was in A. co 319th TCAE about the same time frame.

[fstroupe]

Was wondering if you were around that far back. Yep. A Co 319th makes more sense for a few reasons. I think that the formation had been a Brigade formation and the 519th commander took over for the ceremony, really didn't make sense for that many jumpmasters in the 519th alone.

Were you in the formation? My memories are getting a little foggy and wondering what else I forgot.

Do you remember Antoinette Mancusi? I think she was an analyst. She was the friend.

[mphellon]

Your friends name sounds familiar, been a long time. However Molly I remember very well the TCAE was in the office next to mine at the SRF. I was the commcenter supervisor in those days.

[fstroupe]

If you knew her she was easily remembered, always complaining, always on profile, had no business being in the army. At one time I'm pretty sure she was Molly's roommate. Tall for a woman, big boned. Don't remember her fiancee's name but he was from Maine and had such a strong accent I couldn't understand him most of the time.

[desertkniteertknite]

In 91 at BAC in wonderful Fort Benning my class was graduating on the drop zone because of fog canceling some of our jumps eelier in the week. Turns out it couldn’t have been more fitting as it was the 50th anniversary of the parachute and of the airborne. To celebrate this fact we were honored to have with us the first test platoon and rigger platoon there with us on the drop zone. This was a big local even and CBS, NBC, and ABC were all their with their with their cameras also.
As we jumped and recovered our chutes we would then double time over to the bleachers and form up facing the drop zone with our backs to the proud parents sitting in them. We watched as the other chalks jumped and proceeded their way to us, when all of a sudden tragedy struck. A jumper had left the aircraft with arms flaying wildly and got them tangled in his chute. The result of this was a streamer and he was rocketing to the ground. All of us in formation were yelling for him to pull his reserve, while behind us the parents were wishing the worse up on their children. I literally remember hearing “It’s my son, It’s my son he is such a f*ck up”. Well as the jumper fell past tree top level at the end of the drop zone our view was obscured and we were expecting the worse. The ambulance went rolling around the road at top speed sirens blaring and the only thing we could think of was “Blood on the Risers”. After about ten minutes though the ambulance returns and then a miracle happened. The back doors opened, out came the gurney, and SGT Airborne Pinned the wings upon the young troops chest, and looked around and reminded us that we only had to “exit 5 times” to get the wings. He said this right in front of all the news crews and parents. Then the gurney was rolled back up into the ambulance and off they went to the hospital. The miracle was that the kids chute opened below treetop level and he got his opening shock followed a second later by hitting the ground. “Lucky”, as he became known, had no serious injuries outside of a lot of bruising and stiffness.
After the excitement was over we went ahead with the ceremony. They called out the third generation of paratroops, and they moved forward, then they called out the second generation of paratroops and we moved out in front of the third generation. They asked us where our fathers served, and I stood ramrod straight and looked at SGT Airborne and told him my father was in the 101^st in WWII and made all of their combat drops with them and fought at Bastogne. That gave me the honor of having one of the original test parachutists pin my wings on me. He fuddled with them for a bit, and finally got them trough my BDU’s and then taped them into my chest, and put the backing on after that. After the ceremony while we were still all standing there my bane showed up. SGT Airborne Edwards. I realize now that what he was doing while messing with me all during course is just a fine Airborne NCO tradition, as I found myself doing the same thing to my troops later. I was 6’4” and WT 218 at the time, and Edwards was only 5’9” but he was about 3’ across at the shoulders and had guns that looked like they must have been 48 inches to younger troops. He stared at me with the one eye that was showing, the other covered by his beret that he wore cocked and with an attitude. He really looked like he was in John Wayne’s movie “the Green Berets” lol. With his low grumbling voice he said “I seen that your wings didn’t draw enough blood, are you ready for some real wings Airborne?” being the young and cocky private that I was I said “Sure do you know someone that can give them?” He reached back and I swear to God that he grabbed gravel with his punch and he came forward with it and knocked me two ranks back into the formation. I picked myself up and moved back to where I was and he then asked “what do you think of those?” “Outstanding SGT” I replied. “Don’t you mean SGT Airborne?” he asked. “Negative” I replied “I am airborne now too”. “Good to hear it and welcome, now do some pushups you cherry”. And that was our Graduation from BAC. The real fun would start the next day as we chased the truck to the R.I.P compound lol.

[vnvetret]

Not meaning to show my age, but when I graduated BAC in May 1965, my first wings did not have the pins as they do today, they were pinned on like a big, heavy safety pin. So, "Blood Wings" were such in name only, signifying only that they were your original wings.

[fstroupe]

“Don’t you mean SGT Airborne?” he asked. “Negative” I replied “I am airborne now too”.

Awesome story.

vnvetret, I have wondered from time to time when the wings changed from the original design to the "push pin" style. I didn't realize that they had not changed by the early 60s.

[Hendo]

I've seen those "safety pin" wings before. I think the ones that I put on an old uniform that was set to go to a museum or memorial of some sort were real silver too. They were with a set of gliders wings made the same way and pretty thick by today's standards. Me and a buddy got some metal polish and shined up all of the brass and badges for that uniform and it looked sharp in the end. The lady that dropped it off didn't even recognize it anymore. All but my Canadian wings were blood. It's really the only way to go .