We all attended "pinning" ceremonies for Senior and Master Wings. I've seen wings pinned on with a kevlar or steel pot, saw a guy punched so hard by a bodybuilder running from across the room that he slammed against the wall five feet behind him...I think that the pins were sticking out of the guy's back and stuck into the wall LOL. One where like 50 guys were lined up to punch this poor skinny mofo. But none compared to this.
I spent about 1.5 years in the 519th MI Bn, 525th MI Bde, XVIII Corps. The battalion was only maybe 20% paratroopers when I arrived, maybe 30% or so when I left. Probably six months into my being assigned there I was attached to Joint Special Operations Command, but I occasionally was ordered to come back to the unit for records checks, etc. I'm pretty sure this ceremony was one of those occasions.
For those of you who have never been in a Combat Service or Service Support battalion, non-infantry LTCs tend to be wannabee infantry commanders, and since none of them have been infantry, they tend to run their battalions as they imagine an infantry commander would, and tend to be TOO hardcore. On top of that, this guy also had to contend with wanting to be the Commander of a REAL Airborne unit rather than a leg unit with a smattering of paratroopers...so he was usually a real dick because of an inferiority complex that they all have.
Seems that the formation started out with everyone from the battalion, don't remember the purpose. After that business was taken care of, all legs were told to leave the formation, and all new Senior and Master Wings recipients were called out, at least a dozen of them.
One of those who had recently earned Senior Wings was a female SGT that I knew personally. She was in a different company but we had a common close (female) friend who had introduced us, and though we never really were that close we had done PT runs together several times, had been at the same parties or gatherings, etc.
She was I guess the most hardcore female soldier I met while I was in the army. I don't recall her name, it totally escapes me, but her dad had been a fairly famous commander of 75th Ranger Regiment. (or at least everyone knew the name and associated it with him) She could out run, out ruck, out pushup me and probably 3/4th of the guys I ever knew. She was also very intelligent, I don't recall her MOS but it was one of the MI Signal Intelligence MOSs and they all were pretty tough. Not sure if she had a college degree at the time but she had already done some college. She was a pretty hard partyer, but seemed to know when to stop, and she at least acted heterosexual. (no, I never did her but I knew a guy or two that probably had)
And she may have been the foxiest woman I ever saw in uniform. Lookswise, she had everything going for her, including a beautiful pair of breasts that looked as if they may explode at any time. In this day and time you would be pretty certain that they weren't real, as common as cosmetic surgery is, but hell, back then they had to be. And those breasts are the highlight of this story.
So those to be honored fell into a single rank in front of the formation. The Commander produced a Kevlar that he was going to use to hammer the wings home. He didn't hit THAT hard, but it doesn't take much with those heavy bastards. As he stood in front of each honoree, the formation was screaming BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD!.
Then he stood in front of her. He obviously had not thought about pinning wings on a female soldier with such large breasts, and you could see that he was totally at a loss. The crowd was silent. I personally did not want to see anyone damage those beautiful bazzongas, but that's just me. Thinking back, it was kind of like being in the Roman Coliseum, waiting on Cesar to give the "thumbs up" or "thumbs down", time stood still waiting on the events to finish unfolding.
After what seemed an eternity, though it was probably only three or four seconds, she yelled BLOOD! The formation went crazy! The LTC still was very unsure about it but now he had no choice. He placed the wings and tapped them smartly with the Kevlar. There was no explosion. She didn't even make a face, as had most of the guys.
I'm pretty sure that was the last time I was in the battalion area except while I was outprocessing to head back to Division a few months later. I ran into her occasionally the first year or so after I went back to Division but never in a one-on-one situation where I might mention the ceremony, and never saw her again after that. I suppose that she is now probably an executive in a high-tech defense contractor or the like, she seemed to be that kind of chick.