A drunk young Paratrooper who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest.

The Hooah's tie was stained, his facewas plastered with red lipstick,and a half-empty bottle of gin was stickingout of his torn coat pocket.
He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the young man turned to the priest and asked,
'Say Father,what causes arthritis?'
The priest replies, 'My Son, it's caused by loose living,being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath.'
The private muttered in response, 'Well, I'll be damned, ' Then returned tohis paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the manand apologized.'I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong.How long have you had arthritis?'
The private answered, 'I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does.'