The Paratrooper Association - Home of the Airborne - The Cigar Club http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/ Discuss random topics, thoughts and other musings. en Wed, 19 Jun 2013 18:47:29 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/images/misc/rss.png The Paratrooper Association - Home of the Airborne - The Cigar Club http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/ Outstanding Soviet WW2 documentary. http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35150-Outstanding-Soviet-WW2-documentary?goto=newpost Tue, 18 Jun 2013 14:42:59 GMT Interesting to hear their perspective on the war. There are 18 parts. I provide the 1st. It's easy to find the others on your own. Enjoy as it is very interesting. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0A6UWkK2U4s ]]> The Cigar Club Eagle9294 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35150-Outstanding-Soviet-WW2-documentary Amazing the amount of posers. http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35142-Amazing-the-amount-of-posers?goto=newpost Mon, 17 Jun 2013 13:59:19 GMT I have met several people wearing SF attire and trying to pass themselves off as SF vets. I ask them about the Q course. They never got "asked" to attend that particular course. :mrgreen: I ask them about Robin Sage. They hear he was a nice guy. [heh] Most of these men have been over 45. Sad. One realized that I outed him and he went to his car and changed his "made up" DCU shirt. ]]> The Cigar Club Eagle9294 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35142-Amazing-the-amount-of-posers Soldier Hard http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35141-Soldier-Hard?goto=newpost Mon, 17 Jun 2013 08:07:18 GMT This guy was a tanker and is a Veteran. He suffers from PTSD and uses music to help himself and bring Veterans issues to light. His words are true. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X92tVxqnmHs This guy was a tanker and is a Veteran. He suffers from PTSD and uses music to help himself and bring Veterans issues to light. His words are true.

]]> The Cigar Club ABN5-0 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35141-Soldier-Hard Gunston Street cartoon http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35136-Gunston-Street-cartoon?goto=newpost Sun, 16 Jun 2013 11:59:23 GMT Sorry but I am not sure how to make this bigger. Anyways, screwing with a cherry jumper was always fun. Attachment 20609 (http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/attachment.php?attachmentid=20609) Sorry but I am not sure how to make this bigger. Anyways, screwing with a cherry jumper was always fun.

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]]> The Cigar Club ABN5-0 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35136-Gunston-Street-cartoon Nazi SS Officer living in MN http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35128-Nazi-SS-Officer-living-in-MN?goto=newpost Fri, 14 Jun 2013 13:28:10 GMT Officer of a Nazi SS-led unit accused of burning villages has been living in Minnesota. Evidence uncovered by The Associated Press. http://news.yahoo.com/ap-impact-commander-ss-led-unit-living-us-101016457.html Officer of a Nazi SS-led unit accused of burning villages has been living in Minnesota. Evidence uncovered by The Associated Press.
http://news.yahoo.com/ap-impact-comm...101016457.html ]]> The Cigar Club Recon133 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35128-Nazi-SS-Officer-living-in-MN IL CCW Update http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35114-IL-CCW-Update?goto=newpost Thu, 13 Jun 2013 00:56:58 GMT Source: straight from the ISRA. 6/12/13. _This synopsis of HB1083 is not to be used as legal advice_ _Regulations:_ •One statewide shall-issue licensing standard. •With regard to concealed carry licenses, preempts local authority of governments... Source: straight from the ISRA. 6/12/13. This synopsis of HB1083 is not to be used as legal advice
Regulations:
•One statewide shall-issue licensing standard.
•With regard to concealed carry licenses, preempts local authority of governments to regulate handguns and ammunition for handguns, including licensing, registration, and transportation.
•With regard to FOID card holders, preempts local governments from regulating the transportation of all firearms and ammunition.
•Not preempted are AWB enacted prior to or within 10 days of the enactment of this legislation - after that date, new AWBs would be preempted. Local governments could still regulate rifles and shotguns, but not handguns.
•Grants "safe haven" protection for people carrying concealed while in their vehicle even in prohibited areas.
•Upon exit from their vehicle, the firearm must be locked in their vehicle. If they wish to lock their firearm in their trunk, it must be unloaded before exiting the vehicle.
•License to be issued by the Illinois State Police.
•$150.00 fee for 5 years.
•Requires 16 hours of training, including range time. Up to 8 hours of credit will be recognized for those who had hunter safety, was honorably discharged from the military, or had other CCW training. At this time, states with shorter training time, such as Utah, may only be credited 4 hours. The administrative rules of what the allowances will be, have not yet been determined.
•Private property owners can post their property prohibiting concealed carry. "Safe haven" still applies to their parking lots.
•Restaurants with 50% or more of their receipts from food, but still serving alcohol, are legal to carry in, but are still subject to private property posting by the owners or operators.
•Law enforcement may object to a person they believe to be a "clear and present danger" to themselves or others. Applicants can appeal that decision to the Concealed Carry Licensing Board.
•The State Police have 180 days from the effective date of this bill to be set up to begin processing applications.
•Within 60 days of the effective date of this bill, the Illinois State Police shall begin approval of firearm training courses and instructors.
•There is no reciprocity, but "safe haven" applies to out of state concealed carry permit holders.
Prohibited Places: remember that "safe haven" applies to most of these places:
•Property under control of an elementary or secondary school
•Pre-school or child care facilities
•Property under control of an officer of the legislative or executive branch of government, except DNR regulated areas where firearms are allowed
•Courthouses
•Libraries
•Airports
•Gaming facilities
•Stadiums, arenas, sporting events
Amusement parks
•Museums and zoos
•Buildings under the control of local government
•Jails and detention facilities
•Hospitals and mental health facilities
•Mass public transportation
•Bars
•Public gatherings, but walk through is allowed to get to your home, place of business, or vehicle
•Places that have special event liquor licenses
•Any public park, with an exception for walking or bicycle trails, if only a portion of the trail goes through the park. The walkers and bicyclists must stay on the trail
•Colleges and universities and property under their control; they may develop their own rules
•Any area where firearms are prohibited under federal law
•Nuclear facilities ("safe haven" for the parking area does NOT apply)
Note: Bill has not been signed yet. Quinn has until July 8th to sign or veto. ]]> The Cigar Club Recon133 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35114-IL-CCW-Update Sleep Safe http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35106-Sleep-Safe?goto=newpost Tue, 11 Jun 2013 16:52:47 GMT The USMC Counter Terroist Team is on the job. Attachment 20573 (http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/attachment.php?attachmentid=20573) The USMC Counter Terroist Team is on the job.

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]]> The Cigar Club Santo Tomas http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35106-Sleep-Safe <![CDATA[[Comedy] Satan comes to Church]]> http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35103-Satan-comes-to-Church?goto=newpost Tue, 11 Jun 2013 01:31:58 GMT One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away. Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman... One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.
Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"
The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"
"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.
Perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years." ]]> The Cigar Club T10 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35103-Satan-comes-to-Church Civilian vs. Military friends http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35097-Civilian-vs-Military-friends?goto=newpost Mon, 10 Jun 2013 03:59:03 GMT From Military Police WTF! Moments on FB:

Quote:
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Tell you not to do something stupid when drunk
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will post 360 security so you don't get caught

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs
MILITARY FRIENDS: Call your parents Drunk as hell and tell them
about the hott as hell but dirty chick you tried to pick up

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Hope the night out drinking goes smoothly, and hope that no one is late for the ride home.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Know some wild shit will happen, and set up rally points and an E & E route.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will be sitting next to you saying, Damn...we fucked up...but hey, that shit was fun as fuck!"

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Cry with you.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Laugh at you and tell you to put some Vagasil on your pussy.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Steal each other's stuff so often nobody remembers who bought it in the first place.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Are happy that someone picked up a one night stand and leave them alone.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will Low Crawl naked into the room with a camera and hope for the tag team.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will listen to your relationship problems and hope it works out for you.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will listen to you over a long hard road march, and will help you straighten it out better than Dr. Phil.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Might try to hit on your girl behind your back.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Have spooned with you in the field more than your girl has, and would never even think about doing that.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'm home!"

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will try and talk to the bouncer when you get tossed out of the bar.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will man up and go after the bouncer for touching you on the way out.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will wish you had enough money to go out that night, and are sorry you couldn't come.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will share their last dollar with you, drag you along, and try to steal free drinks all night.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "Bitch, you better drink the rest of that shit, you know we don't waste.. That's alcohol abuse!!!"

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Want the money they loaned you back next week.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Can't begin to remember who owes who money after taking care of each other for so long.

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will say "I can't handle Tequila anymore".
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will say "okay just one more" and then 2 minutes later "okay just one more".

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out!!

CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will tell you "They'd take a bullet for you."
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will actually take a bullet for you.
]]> The Cigar Club ABN5-0 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35097-Civilian-vs-Military-friends <![CDATA[[Comedy] Blind Pilots]]> http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35076-Blind-Pilots?goto=newpost Sat, 08 Jun 2013 00:21:36 GMT Part of Air Canada's recent settlement with the Unions was hiring handicapped people! So, the other day passengers on a small commuter plane were waiting for the flight to leave. The entrance opened, and two men walked up the aisle, dressed in pilots' uniforms and both wearing dark glasses. One pilot was using a seeing-eye dog, and the other was tapping his way up the aisle with a white cane. Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin; but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start up. The passengers begin glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and faster down the runway, and people at the windows realize that they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport territory.

As it begins to look as though the plane will never take off, that it will plough into the water, panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.

The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and soon they have all retreated into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the plane is in good hands.

Up front in the cockpit, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says, "You know, Bob, one of these days, they're going to scream too late, and we'll all die. . ." ]]> The Cigar Club T10 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35076-Blind-Pilots Happy Birthday recondo82! http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35071-Happy-Birthday-recondo82!?goto=newpost Fri, 07 Jun 2013 10:14:51 GMT Hope you have a great day brother and come back to see these well wishes! Hope you have a great day brother and come back to see these well wishes! ]]> The Cigar Club Rocket1972 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35071-Happy-Birthday-recondo82! Happy Birthday Hardcore Harry! http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35063-Happy-Birthday-Hardcore-Harry!?goto=newpost Thu, 06 Jun 2013 00:35:12 GMT Hope you are doing well my brother and having a great birthday! Hope you are doing well my brother and having a great birthday! ]]> The Cigar Club Rocket1972 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35063-Happy-Birthday-Hardcore-Harry! A new SEAL book... http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35048-A-new-SEAL-book?goto=newpost Tue, 04 Jun 2013 15:21:44 GMT http://gma.yahoo.com/transgender-navy-seal-warrior-princess-comes-005114970--abc-news-topstories.htmlhttp://gma.yahoo.com/transgender-navy-seal-warrior-princess-comes-005114970--abc-news-topstories.html http://gma.yahoo.com/transgender-nav...opstories.html ]]> The Cigar Club tw5270 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35048-A-new-SEAL-book <![CDATA[[Comedy] Urinalysis]]> http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35033-Urinalysis?goto=newpost Sun, 02 Jun 2013 21:51:58 GMT One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him,
"My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner.
Just give it a urine sample and the computer'll tell you what's wrong
and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...
a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."

So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to the drugstore.
He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample.
He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer
ejects a printout: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid
heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.

That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering
if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog,
urine samples from his wife and daughter, and masturbated into the mixture for good measure.

Jack hurries back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars,
pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant...twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better. ]]> The Cigar Club T10 http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35033-Urinalysis <![CDATA[[Comedy] Mortarman receives award for stopping "Green on Blue" attack...]]> http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35029-Mortarman-receives-award-for-stopping-quot-Green-on-Blue-quot-attack?goto=newpost Sun, 02 Jun 2013 14:44:39 GMT BAGRAM AIRFIELD, AFGHANISTAN — Tragedy was averted today at one of the largest US military bases in Afghanistan after an Airman successfully stopped a ‘green-on-blue’ attack. Following a trend of attacks on U.S. forces by their Afghan counterparts, an Afghan National Army (ANA) soldier was able to smuggle a weapon onto the sprawling base and opened fire on several Airmen standing in a smoking shack.


Luckily for those present, the ANA soldier’s marksmanship skills were so poorly developed that he missed with all thirty rounds in his magazine, giving the rest of the Airmen a chance to run for cover and Technical Sergeant Ralph Johnson the chance of a lifetime.

He was wearing his 9mm Beretta pistol in a custom-embroidered leather shoulder holster, commonly referred to as a “FOB Bra.”

Typically regarded as the ultimate sign of a true FOB dweller — or someone who never leaves the perimeter of their base while deployed — there has not been a single documented case of a US military member actually engaging anyone with their weapon while wearing the scorned leather harness in almost 12 years of combat operations.

Unfortunately for Johnson, his inexperience with weapons and the fact that he had not removed the pistol from the holster to clean it during the entire four months he’d been deployed eliminated his chances to make history. The rotund NCO attempted to draw his pistol, but the forward sight notch became stuck as he struggled to bring his weapon to bear. At the same time, the ANA soldier, Private Mohammed Gul Mohammed, growled in frustration while he attempted to reload his AK-47, incorrectly inserting the magazine over and over again despite the hours of drills forced upon him by his ISAF trainers. As the sirens of the sprawling airbase’s Quick Reaction Force began to wail, both men glared hatefully at each other, knowing they only had moments left to finish their deadly business.

Finally, Johnson was able to remove his pistol and he smiled triumphantly as he pointed the weapon at his foe, a scant 10 meters away, and pulled the trigger. Nothing happened. Confusion clouded the NCO’s thickly mustached face until he realized that the safety was on.

He quickly corrected the situation, shouting “prepare to get your virgins!” at the still struggling Mohammed.

Misfortune struck the Air Force NCO again when he pulled the trigger and realized that a magazine had not been inserted into the pistol. A cold sweat broke out on the man’s face as he fumbled with the rusted buttons on his harness that hadn’t been opened since he first inserted the ammunition magazines almost four months prior. When Johnson finally removed and seated the magazine properly into the weapon he heard a deadly metallic click. Mohammed had also managed to successfully insert his own 30-round 7.62mm magazine into his AK-47.

Both men raised their weapons simultaneously, and with malice blazing in their eyes, began firing. Rounds cracked off of the concrete blast barriers, thudded into wooden roof supports, and ricocheted off the asphalt road as distant bystanders dove for cover, but neither man was able to hit his opponent.

Army Private Jared Taylor, a witness on the scene, gave his account of the gun battle.

“So I hear all this shooting and I run around the corner towards the smoking area. These two guys are standing there screaming at each other from about twenty feet, blazing away. One was a skinny little Afghan dude who could barely hold his AK while he sprayed rounds all over the place. He couldn’t hit shit. The other guy was this fat-ass Air Force NCO who was trying to shoot his M-9 one handed while he covered his face with the other. I’m pretty sure his eyes were closed the whole time. I’ve never seen anything like it. I just stood there laughing until they ran out of ammo. That’s when I remembered to shoot the Afghan guy in the head with my M-4. He was so close I couldn’t miss.”

For his actions that day, Al "Big Al" Mortarman has been awarded the Air Force Commendation Medal.

http://www.duffelblog.com/2012/09/ai...n-blue-attack/

Read more: http://www.duffelblog.com/2012/09/ai...#ixzz2V4PPDiCL
Follow us: @theduffelblog on Twitter | duffelblog on Facebook ]]> The Cigar Club Ops NCO http://www.armyparatrooper.org/dropzone/showthread.php/35029-Mortarman-receives-award-for-stopping-quot-Green-on-Blue-quot-attack